Hatchet Endorses Lamest Election Ever
In a move of mediocrity that stunned risk-takers around the world, The Hatchet has endorsed Hilary Clinton and John McCain for President. The Huffington Post is reporting a large bump in the polls for both candidates.
In ol’ Travis’ opinion, that is the most boring election combination he can think of. Clinton vs. McCain is like Gray vs. Grey, if both spellings of Grey/Gray were best friends. I think Obama v. Huckabee would be a lot of fun, simply because they are both excellent orators. I think Huckabee is batshit crazy and I think Obama isn’t as clean cut as he says he is, but I think they are both much more entertaining. Entertainment: my number one priority in the ‘08 election.
Here’s a list of more fun Presidential elections than what the Hatchet has proposed:
- Clinton vs. Clinton
- Obama vs. Milton Bradley
- Huckabee vs. Jude Law’s character in I Heart Huckabees
- JFK vs. FDR
- Knapp vs. Trachtenberg
- The Hatchet vs. Journalist Integrity
- Kucinich vs. The Cloverfield Monster (visualize that debate/battle to the death)
- P.T. Anderson vs. P.T. Barnum
- The Colonialist vs. Jesus Christ
- Jukebox The Ghost vs. Bottles/Cans
- Student Association vs. Program Board
- John McCain’s mother vs. Afterlife
- Nicole Capp vs. Mark Abanto
- The new Hatchet Blogs vs. Updates
There you have it. It’s pretty comprehensive. Fired up and ready to go.
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